“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.” - Christopher McCandless
Children are experts at exploring the unknown. The possibilities are endless for them. Imagine a baby who is scared of uncertainty – would she ever walk?
Whatever happened to that exuberance of venturing into the unknown?
Somewhere along the journey, at a very young age, we started coming up with rules for our lives – which were influenced by our families, our cultures, our schools – about what we can and cannot do. We became suspicious of certain kinds of people, developed judgments, and limited our options.
We decided that in order to get the approval of those whose love we craved, we needed to pursue what they believed to be acceptable. That, we felt, was the recipe for happiness.
Gradually, the voice of the curious child started to fade as we operated within the confines of rules we created to keep us safe and get approval. But in reality, does that make us happy?
Playing it safe does not apply to those of us with BIG dreams. The rules we established years ago no longer fit, like the pants you wore when you were seven. To achieve our full potential, we need to grow and expand our limits – burst out of those pants like The Incredible Hulk. Otherwise, we feel trapped.
If we are following someone else’s model, it is likely that we are not aligned with our calling – we are not living at our capacity.
For many people, there is a gap between what they are currently doing and where their calling lies. On the outside we may have it all based on the expectations of others, but on the inside there is a disconnect. The longer we wait, the greater the chasm and the pain.
What’s calling you? Are you drawn to it or are you moving further away by trying to win the approval of others? How is that making you feel?
What different choice can you make? What new actions can you take? What do YOU want?
If you are not sure, coaching might be right for you.
Do you want to realize your best life? Message me at [email protected], and let’s schedule a chat to see if we are a fit or to help you find other resources to best serve you.
Want to receive these posts directly to your inbox? Click here to sign up and receive your free guide to discovering your strengths and passions.
Superb writing! I admire the economy of words and clarity of message.
Tanuja, have you heard of the 7 Habits by Stephen Covey? What do you think of it?
Thanks, Alex. I appreciate it. Yes, the 7 Habits is one of my favorite books. Here is a page, which I share with my clients, that does a really good job of summarizing the habits: http://www.team-building-leadership.com/7_habits_of_highly_effective_people.html